By Julie Wright
He has delivered me from all my fears. Psalm 34:4
Fear; to worry, has anxiety, irresolution, dread, mistrust, apprehension as defined by Webster. My definition; one of Satan’s greatest tools.
Ever since that dreadful day on September 5, 2009, when I learned of my husband and father-in-law’s deaths, my widow heart has been heavy with fear. It started that day. How will I provide for our children? How will I be able to take care of a home on my own? How will I pay for a double funeral? How will I be able to get up each and every day without him? The questions went on and on.
Some days the questions seemed to consume my every thought. Actually, there have been days that I allowed the “fear” to cripple me to the point where I couldn’t sleep. There was a period of time when I was happy to get two to three hours of sleep a night and still somehow manage to function at work and keep up with the ever demanding needs of the children and more. All because of fear.
Over time, the questions have changed but the cause has not. Should I leave our home for a new one? Should I step out and have a date? What will my friends think? Still worse, what will my children think?
I have always considered myself to have a strong “faith” if you will. I put my trust in a God who has always loved me, provided for me, and offered me hope when there seemed to be none. I know that this faith has grown over time through the study of His Word and friends and colleagues He has placed in my path. But, Satan still manages to sneak his way in and take hold of my heart in the deepest, lowest points. He is the master of fear.
Faith vs. Fear. It’s been a battle that has been going on since the beginning of time. Look at Eve. She knew that she should have bitten the fruit from the tree, but that snake was just so convincing. Once that bite was made, fear entered her being. She feared the Lord. She feared what He would say, what He would do, and what He would think. We all have been there along this widowhood journey. It is the one constant that follows us along like a lost puppy looking for a good home. Fear is one of Satan’s greatest tools.
How do we win the battle of faith vs. fear? The answer is simple, put on the full armor of God. Dig deep into His word and cling to the hem of his gown even when it seems that the gown is unraveling and you are barely holding on to a thread.
Fear is simply:
Fear is not trusting God.
I have found that the scriptures bring me the most comfort during the deepest and darkest battles. Take a moment to remind yourself of these battle winning truths.
He has delivered me from all my FEARS. Psalm 34:4
Therefore I will not FEAR. Psalm 46:2
Be strong, do not FEAR. Isaiah 35:4
Do not FEAR. I am with you. Isaiah 41:10
He says, “Do not FEAR.” Isaiah 41:13
FEAR not, I have redeemed you. Isaiah 43:1
You have nothing to FEAR. Isaiah 54:4
Perfect love drives out FEAR. 1John 4:18
The final scripture is our answer to the battle. PERFECT LOVE drives out FEAR. God’s love, the only perfect love there has ever been and ever will be. Make a choice this week to focus on God’s truth as you face your battles of fear. Don’t allow Satan to win by crippling you in your emotions, your body, or your life.
What fears are you facing along this widowhood journey? What scriptures have you found to help you get your fears under control and put God back in the driver’s seat? Share with me the fears you have dealt with or are still struggling with. Together we can claim victory over Satan and encourage one another in God’s perfect love.
P.S. It is without fear, that I wish to share with you all, that God has sent an amazing new love into my family’s life. Fear allowed me to cripple myself in sharing with you the journey of our relationship. I allowed my fears of what others might think or say to take over the truth of what God has shown us.
Bobby is an amazing Christian man who has been a part of our lives and family before it ever began. He has helped our family to heal, to laugh, to smile, and to be filled with joy again. He has been answer to my prayers and fears and now he is my new earthly helpmate. Yes, I have remarried…a fear that I never imagined I would overcome.
I will share more about this long, unexpected part of my journey with you later, but for right now I can fearlessly say, “I’m Mrs. Julie Wright.” Yes, I have heard all the jokes…I’ve found Mr. Wright and I’ve covered the fundamentals going from Reed to Wright, but seriously, I’m so grateful that God allowed this man to come into our family’s lives and bless us in unimaginable ways. Battle on, my friends, battle on! Face your fears, one scripture filled battle at a time.